Potline Palsy and Malt Liquor

 I have been out being All Cool and stuff since this has been an incredible summer and people need to be exposed to my personal coolness.  Of course for each cult movie showing, street fair, Old Settlers Picnic and graveyard ramble, there's been about five garage sales, antique stores, estate auctions, thrift shops and 'free pile' visits. That is just me doing my part to make the dead peoples' belongings of Whatcom County feel loved. And photographed. And smelled in many cases.

Here we are in Ferndale, WA, locally known as 'Ferntucky'. What is Ferntucky known for across this great nation of ours?  

                                                                            This thing vvv

                                                      And yes, Metallica know it exists.

This is an old railroad bridge through the middle of town that people have been painting 'Metallica' on for over thirty years. Yes, really. The railroad paints it out, someone paints it back. Over and over. Again and again.  Because Ferntucky. The bridge even has it's own Facebook page (which I cannot link because I was kicked off Facebook some years back and refuse to re-engage) in which the bridge is personified and 'speaks for itself', which is cringe as you might imagine. Who's responsible for that silliness?  

City of Ferndale Chamber of Commerce *cue banjos*

__________________________

Anyway, I am in Etta's Attic Antique store in Ferndale snappin' shots:

I used to collect old kitchenware. To this day I am tempted by the stuff.  I spot twenty-one items in this picture alone that I've owned before, and that includes the fabulous yellow kitchen table!  Do I want to own it all again?  YES. 

 

Just kind of a general, plain view of the place. Yes, there's a lot of average crap here, things that aren't that old or that special. 

Then again...

What's that center bottom there?  

Wait. Just wait.

See?  Here is Hangover Cat. I like Hangover Cat. He was going cheap, too. Sadly, I do not have room for Hangover Cat. 

Sigh.

Here's the secret to shopping this place:  you have to DIG.

In a lot of the booths here the stuff is layered three and four deep. I like having to dig; it usually means that the owner doesn't pay much attention to stock, and you can find real bargains and forgotten treasures in that bottommost layer. 

Speaking of garbage, you see that red book "The Return"? with Trump looking orange on the cover? (Center far right - naturally.) That's the kind of virulent Red-State propaganda you find out here in the county, and you just overlook it...or you hide the book face-down underneath a pile of stuff on the floor, way back against the wall. 

Ahem.

Here is your grandmothers' girdle for sale. 

Admit it, that's exactly what you were looking for. 

 

Look at this fucking thing. 

I mean look at it. 

An old playbill!  In a box filled with them! 

They were all from the late forties - early Sixties. 

Could this be a caricature of Jane Withers? It's such a familiar face and yet I can't place it. Possibly Anne Miller? Or Ethel Merman? (My bet's on Ethel.)

UPDATE: Yup, it's Ethel.

Call Me Madam (1953) HD | Ethel Merman | Donald O'Connor | Vera-Ellen | Music by Irving Berlin ! (youtube.com)

And here is another star of the Broadway stage.*  

 

They want $30 for this thing. I looked it up online and yup, it goes for $30.  

COME ON PEOPLE.

Here's something else that almost came home with me!

 A playbill from The Moulin Rouge!!!!! 

Is it not faboo?

And you know what, I might still go back for it. 

That's why I hid the thing under a stack of old Christmas records. 

Always plan ahead, fellow thrift pirates.

This thing was in all the design magazines for awhile. 

It's a teapot with a cup. 

They want 120.00$ for it. 

They can go suck socks.

My aunt Lilian had a huge, huge version of this Crab Platter. It came with with clams for salt and pepper shakers and an octopus wearing a sailor hat and all kinds of seagoing nonsense. This one is a study in tasteful restraint in comparison.

I examined this thing and discovered that it began life as 1. an old photograph (like early 1900s) of a lady with a bouffant hair style, which was 2. then painted over with a picture of a bulldog, that 3. someone then glued clothing onto.

It has a ten-dollar price tag.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE. 

For the person who loves the 'Sword of Shanarra' books!

 For the basement dweller in your life!  

PRE-OWNED FANTASY KNIVES!!!

I don't know why these are A Thing, but ever since the 1970's, they have been. These huge, ridiculous knives are everywhere, at every swap meet, all over the motorcycle events, and in every junk shop. They cost big, too, new and used. 

And what do you do with them? They don't come sharpened. They're made of pot metal. 

I guess they're just a thing you have. 

A thing that says 'I handle money like a third-grader.'

Poor pug doggie is a study in descending layers of flub.  

A salt and pepper set from back in the days when racism was hilarious fun for all ages. 

I hate to tell you how much this is worth.

 

PLEASE STOP LOOKING AT ME MINIATURE ZOSO DUDE

-oh it's a gnome. 

It's a wooden gnome.

Well that's fine then.

From the 1980s, here we have a Decorative Ceramic Pig Mask.  

How many times have you suffered for the lack of a Ceramic Pig Mask on your wall?

I bet a lot of times.

Perhaps the swankiest crustacean dish of them all.  And the leggiest. I counted six legs on the right and five on the right. The gilded crustacean in question rests on a lily pad which is covered in dainty roses. 

This is a lot of swankiness for one leggy lobster. 

She went into shock before she could give the police a description of the killer. 

So what did I get? Because I did buy something.

Guess. Guess what I got. Three guesses. Come on. Was it a.....

OK fine it was cookbooks. SHIT I FORGOT TO TAKE PIX.  

                                              Now I have to go clean up the road I adopted.

                               

You should go clean up the road you adopted too. 

There's a big old double ended dildo down by the stop sign. 

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*Yoda the Jedi Master

Had a very shiny nose

And if you ever saw it

You could even say it glows

All of the other Jedis

Used to laugh and call him names

They wouldn't let poor Yoda

Join in any Jedi games.

      Gold Diggers of Broadway 1928