Tuesday, July 4, 2023

I Dreamed I Had A Heart Attack In My Maidenform Bra

 I thought I had a heart attack yesterday.  

It was a lovely, warm, calm day.  I was sitting at the table and had just tucked in to a nice bowl of Japanese soup when out of nowhere, a headache began in the middle of my brain, expanded and swelled and got worse and worse and worse until I thought my skull would explode. It happened just as fast as it takes to read that sentence. I got nauseous and short of breath, and came over all clammy.  Chest pain. Tingling hands. I went from feeling as good as I've ever felt in my life to AGONY in three seconds.  It continues to wax and wane after the initial blast, too. I could not have made a phone call, driven a car, or walked to the front door.

In case I've not made my point clearly enough, here is a visual aid.  
 

I was still going "Why? Huh? What?" when the Biker calmly took me to the emergency room.

After ex-rays, cardiograms and a couple of brain scans, I found out:  I was fine. The cardiologist told me that I have the heart and circulatory system of an 18 year old kid (insert 'crawlspace' or 'trunk of my car' joke here) and oddly, my brain scans were 100% normal.  I expected to see weird things, like maybe a pool toy or something. But no.  No sign of an aneurism or an impending aneruism, no alien implants.  And by this time, I was feeling fiiiiiiiine. A little hungry. A little sheepish. The pain had just faded away on it's own. It took about an hour and a half.

Apparently I had a Cluster Headache.  I was given a medication to take if I feel another one coming on, and now I have to go and do a bunch of tests to check all the other things that might be the problem, which really irritates me, but is better than having my head explode and far less of a pain to clean up after, I guess.

The reason this even merits a post is because I had no problems whatsoever up at the hospital.  None. It was fast and professional.  The place was a war zone after Covid; now the whole place has been cleaned, repaired, updated and streamlined.  The staff seemed upbeat, not the downtrodden, resentful drudges I remember. It's not the same St. Joe's that I used to fear, and that is A Very Good Thing. Good health care still happens in America. 

It looks like I won't be dying of a heart attack or an aneurism anytime soon, either. Cool.


11 comments:

  1. Very good to hear! Although I imagine that cluster headaches are no joke, at least they can be dealt with (hopefully). Jx

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    1. It seems to be a case of run for the Benadryl the instant you feel things going tits up - at least until I visit my GP and get a solid diagnosis. I'm pretty sure it's a combination of adjusting my thyroid meds and burgeoning type 2 diabetes. I defeated the latter once. They say it comes back in latter years. We shall see. XOOO Thanks, Jon.

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  2. I'm so glad it wasn't an aneurism! I'm paranoid about those and would immediately run to an ER with the kind of pain you described.

    Take care! xx

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    1. Right?! Me, I was afraid of a heart attack because they present differently in women, so that with the chest pain - pure stress, as it turns out - was enough for the Biker and I. It was only after I got to the ER that I began thinking about aneurisms. My EKG went nuts every time the thought crossed my mind! Thank God they were able to sort it all out.

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  3. Hell's teeth! You scared me there...Now, go make another bowl of that soup and keep the pills handy. XX

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    1. Man, as soon as I got home I was chowing down on that soup! You don't let good japanese soup go to waste! I was hungry! At this age women have so much to worry about...heart attacks that don't present with traditional symptoms, MS...it keeps you hopping. The whole reason I eat Japanese soup for breakfast is because it's vegetarian, low fat, all natural and full of bulk and vitamins and other good stuff. I felt so betrayed! XOO

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  4. NOTICE TO ALL: You people keep me going. I appreciate you so much and I am so grateful to have you all on board. Kids, my 18 - year - old heart is touched. Bless you all. You're wonderful.

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  5. That must have been overwhelmingly frightening. Good for the Biker.

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  6. Very pleased to read that you are well!
    I am shuffling uneasily though as I've been having peculiar pains that I should get checked out - the problem is that our hospitals still seem broken.
    Sx

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    1. Now listen missy - you go get those checked. Remember - a broken UK hospital is a 'business as usual' USA hospital!

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