Hot Naked Titties and Lots of Ass

 Nah, not really.  I just figured it'd pull in the readers that have been avoiding the joint.  Did it work? Huh?  Hello?

So I have been helping Pet Teenager learn how to drive and I really wish her fuckin' father would pull his head out and get with the damn program.  I wasn't bitter about the situation until two days ago when we pulled in to their driveway at the same time Daddy got home from work, and he got out of his car holding a 4Loko. Yeah, dad likes to have a couple tasty beverages on the drive home from work.  Just awesome.

The Biker has a party planned, just a few people from work.  And that's fine, except I haven't met any of them before, ever.  After my last venture into the social arena crapped the rug, all I want to do is cover myself in Fentanyl patches and lie in the back yard.  I don't want to clean the house, I don't want to have company over, I don't want to think up light conversational topics.  I want to lie in the back yard covered in Fentanyl patches. Period.  End of sentence.

Lets see, what else. I watched 'The Haunting of Hill House' and got sick of everyone's issues and all the flashbacks.  I get it, the house is carnivorous, there's a lesbian, next.  

I watched 'Locke and Key' and got sick of that because I really didn't care what wild thing would happen next.  Wild shit is gonna happen next. Point taken.  OK then.  

Watched 'Penny Dreadful' until that jumped the shark, when poor Miss Vanessa Ives starts barfing up toothpaste foam having seizures upstairs in her sweaty old tatty uns, tied  to the bed, while the menfolk stay downstairs, dipshitting around planning to go to find the source of the frickin' Nile. A real case of 'Bitch Can't Get A Break' going on there. Eva Green is a fantastic actress and she's just wasted on this thing.  I had real high hopes for it, but too far is too far. 

It's like this:  The world is being taken over by the Chinese and plastic, the president is a giant vagina and I had to beg grass clippings off the neighbors to fill a hole in my back yard because grass clippings are free.  It's gonna work like a charm, though, gotta say.