Saturday, May 8, 2021

I! HAVE! CONQUERED! TECHNOLOGY!

 Yes, me and my Big Girl Phone are on the best of terms, once I discovered the secret.

What is the secret?

The secret is the Boop Stik.

This is a Boop Stik:

This thing has turned what was an out of control little wafer of annoyance into a purring pussycat of helpful functions.

Hold your horses, get ye ahold of The Mistress and Inexplicable DeVice and let them know the news:
FIRSTNATIONS HAS TAKEN PICTURES OF HER SPRING GARDEN!!!

I can take part in the yearly Garden event thingie!  Because I can take pictures with my phone!  Which is awesome!  And I do intend to take part in the annual Garden picture thingie, whoever is hosting it, so get ready, because A Bitch Grows Some Motherfucking Plants Yo.  Here are a couple of provocative pix to whet your appetites:

This is part of what I like to call 'The Crap Fence" because it has a lot of crap wired to it.  Most of it is pointy crap.  Then you get the occasional tiny bicycle wheel and it all goes to hell and you question your values and shit.


This is what I like to call 'The Back Of My House' and it is the part of my house that has been a house since before this was  America, before there was a border between Canada and America, or even a State of Washington.  It even has a t.v. aerial on it!  As you can see I planted a bunch of crap next to my house.  That loop off to the right side is an upright for my tomato hoop-house raised bed.  Just because I knew you'd want to know.


OK now what the fuck is this boring spiny thing?  This is boring.  I'm bored.  I thought there was gonna be flowers.  What is this thing?  Who cares?  Are we there yet?   

OK, that's enough for one peek.  You have been mystified, stymied, puzzled and discombobulated.  Your will is mine.  I alone own your soul.  There are cannibals under my house.  The wet bird flies at night.









13 comments:

Jon said...

I don't know about cannibals-under-houses, but I know a rampant asparagus plant when I see one... Jx

Steve. Because 'Steve' is almost as nice a name as 'Paul'. said...

Oh you smart person you! I figured everyone would be mystified. I grow it as an ornamental, although I do nibble on it. It's delicious raw, super sweet. And in the fall it turns into a screaming yellow misty cloud, and it's just glorious.

Ms Scarlet said...

I love that implement fence!
From the look of the lawn and the beds, it looks like you're another who's going to put me to shame.
Sx

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Hooray! It's Rancho First Nations!
I agree with Ms Scarlet (of course): that is a cool fence! Can I see a bluebell on the left by the lawn rake? And yellow poppies in the "Back of My House" photo? I also note that you have those pernicious creeping buttercups in your lawn - they are a terror (but the flowers are bright and cheerful).
I'm preparing myself now for a deluge of Garden Photos from you!

anne marie in philly said...

I like the garden tool fence; it's something you don't see every day. it looks like you live in a nice area of WA state.

dinahmow said...

Hallebloodylujah! Ms Nations has got her picture thingy working. I've missed your flowers, 'specially your roses.
Now, whatever else you do DO NOT BREAK THE BOOPER STIK. We need to see you in the annual shin-dig over at IDV's place.

Steve. Because 'Steve' is almost as nice a name as 'Paul'. said...

Ms. Scarlet: You are a very difficult woman to find on the WWW. That notwithstanding, nobody is going to put anybody to shame. It's that you're growing plants. No plants, no air. No air, everyone gaks. Things get all post-apocalyptic. Grow plants!

Steve. Because 'Steve' is almost as nice a name as 'Paul'. said...

Inexplicable DeVice: How much magnification did you use to scope out my lawn? There shouldn't be a single buttercup in sight! It's all Welsh poppy, you tart! I may throw a tizzy! Just wait!

Steve. Because 'Steve' is almost as nice a name as 'Paul'. said...

anne marie in philly: Thank you! I live in a cold area of Washington state, five blocks from the Canadian border! Despite what the USDA seems to think, I live in a zone 6 climate and plant accordingly. And that's all I do. Stick stuff in the ground, weed, trim, have naked peanut butter rituals, water, rake, and mow. Easy peasy!

Steve. Because 'Steve' is almost as nice a name as 'Paul'. said...

dinahmow: I've missed you too! You're another one who's hard to find on the WWW! Every time Blogger improves something, it...doesn't improve. I am dying to see what you've got going on in your garden - the giant golden spiders, the saltwater crocodiles, the AMAZEBALLS PLANTS...post up some pix!

Steve. Because 'Steve' is almost as nice a name as 'Paul'. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ms Scarlet said...

Dinah and I are awkward buggers to find because we are on WordPress.
Dinah is http://moreidlethoughts.wordpress.com
and I am at https://wonky-words.com/blog/

I tried to do links, but Blogger thought I was a spammer and deleted me!!
Sxx

dinahmow said...

Here I am! Not much garden to see here as we only moved in in August.